A Nobody's Love

I was prepared to take the dive
To fuel the reason why I'm still alive
Ready to throw myself in head first
Into the deep with a heart filled with thirst
And if I find that we shan't work
Better you, than I, that be the jerk

What I was not prepared to gain
Was another person's stain
That left him unable to leave the past
So he holds onto this idea that we'd last
A broken promise that broke his heart
I didn't know how I would play my part

If our fate should separate into two
Wish me well as I would wish it for you
And if I shan't see you for a while
Remember me as the one who made you smile
Like two puzzle pieces that almost fit
Close to perfect but not quite it

I was prepared to get my foot in the door
But not if I knew I'd hurt you more
If I should get the short end later on
I'll fix myself when you're gone
I'm just a nobody waiting for a nobody too
So I might not be that somebody for you

[I wrote this a while back. I guess it's about starting a relationship and being afraid of the future. My biggest fear is to let someone in and I end up hurting him. I guess this is what I was talking about when I called myself a considerate person. Humble? sometimes. haha.

I think emotionally, I'm stronger than a lot of people. My emotions are something I can control. At least, my emotions are my own problem. But when it comes to other people and their feelings.. it gets complicated. I've always been by myself. I like my alone time and I hate when people depend on me. I guess it's a fear of letting people down. Will I ever consider myself? Will I give up this fear and take the chance of possibly breaking someone's heart?

Like Emily Dickinson's poem: I'm just a nobody looking for a nobody..]
I'm nobody! Who are you?
Are you nobody, too?
Then there's a pair of us — don't tell!
They'd banish us; you know!
How dreary to be somebody!
How public like a frog
To tell one's name the livelong day
To an admiring bog!

I'm Nobody! Who are you? Are you – Nobody – too? Then there's a pair of us! Don't tell! they'd advertise – you know! How dreary – to be – Somebody! How public – like a Frog –  To tell one's name – the livelong June –  To an admiring Bog! - See more at: http://www.poets.org/viewmedia.php/prmMID/15392#sthash.gwKAYspu.dpuf

I'm Nobody! Who are you? Are you – Nobody – too? Then there's a pair of us! Don't tell! they'd advertise – you know! How dreary – to be – Somebody! How public – like a Frog –  To tell one's name – the livelong June –  To an admiring Bog! - See more at: http://www.poets.org/viewmedia.php/prmMID/15392#sthash.gwKAYspu.dpuf

I'm Nobody! Who are you? Are you – Nobody – too? Then there's a pair of us! Don't tell! they'd advertise – you know! How dreary – to be – Somebody! How public – like a Frog –  To tell one's name – the livelong June –  To an admiring Bog! - See more at: http://www.poets.org/viewmedia.php/prmMID/15392#sthash.gwKAYspu.dpuf

I'm Nobody! Who are you? Are you – Nobody – too? Then there's a pair of us! Don't tell! they'd advertise – you know! How dreary – to be – Somebody! How public – like a Frog –  To tell one's name – the livelong June –  To an admiring Bog! - See more at: http://www.poets.org/viewmedia.php/prmMID/15392#sthash.gwKAYspu.dpuf]